Agent_Moldy:
Elite special forces, nicknamed the "Good Humor Brigade" prepare to begin the ground invasion against terrorism. Cries of, "Bomb pops AWAYYYY!!!" and "Taste cold, red, white, and blue, fruit-juicy DEATH!!!" could be heard amongst their ranks.
suggs:
We who are about to distribute soft-serve, SALUTE YOU!!!
144b:
On the next, Band of Brothers. "E" Company clashes with the dreaded German Pantzer Ice Cream division in the defence of Bastone
Buffoon:
In the most diabolical psychological warfare counter attack ever devised, the United States prepares to send the crack "Popsicle Joe" battalion into Afghanistan. Instructions are simple. Whatever they're asked for, they're out of... but the music never stops playing.
Steve_Reeves:
The Good Humor Drivers of America stand ready to defend our borders with...fudgecicles...oh, nevermind...
DiscoBoy:
Meant as a show of patriotic dairy pride, the Million Milk Man March somehow didn't exactly strike fear into the hearts of the Al Queada.
questor:
"The FBI thwarted this failed Taliban assault when it was discovered that each ice-cream flavor had the slight aftertaste of camel's ass".
Ash_Skywalker:
"Dude, WHICH ONE is my car?!"
robofreak:
"Ms. O'Donnell? Lunch is served."
Generik:
While Carnation's secret cloning process was never very successful in duplicating humans, it worked like a charm in reproducing exact copies of the 1949 Ford Milkmaster ice cream and dairy truck. And thus an empire was born.
Nyssa23:
Reid Fleming presides over the first meeting of his fan club.
nashtbrutusandshort:
Meanwhile, on the Afghanistan border...
UnReality:
"Fire up the Sno-Cones, boys, and let the invasion begin!"
nastinkers:
A little known part of Hitler's force was the much-feared "Ice Cream Regime." The premise behind the group was to drive the US troops insane with the tinkling ice cream truck music. It nearly brought about the destruction of the troops on D-Day.
teambanzai:
(sung to the tune of the Green Beret) o/~ Black bands across their chest. These Icecream men, America's best. 10,000 men will try today, but only 9,999 will wear the white beret... o/~
IMissMST3K:
No, I parked in the Good Humor section, row H... or was it J?!? Cripes! I can't remember where I parked?!?
HoneyT:
The aftermath of the Great Milk-Man Massacre of '73.
Annakie7:
"Dad, was this *really* what C.W. McCall's 'Convoy' was about? I don't remember anything about 'a righteous army bearing chocolate eclairbars...'"
ArtMystery:
o/` White men and white trucks / never reaching the end / ice cream I've purchased / never meaning to spend... o/`
Shandi:
<Voiceover> Here at the Good Humor Military Academy, we teach Honor, Discipline, and the value of an Ice Cream Bomb in creating world peace! </Voiceover>
TeekieT:
"Next Saturday the History Channel continues with 'The German March down WW2's Rocky Road.' Episode 7 in its 10 part series on the 'Elite of the Elite: Hitler's SS Panzer Ice-Cream Division' 1:00 PM EST/PST"
Soozcat:
Looks like a Trabant, but she'll make point five beyond the speed of light. Made the Kessel run in less than twelve parsecs.
rickubis:
Federal agents swept down on an illegal cloning facility in the Rio Grande Valley today. Thousands of cloned Good Humor Men were rounded up and destroyed. When asked how they were able to succeed in their cloning efforts, the rogue scientists replied, "Aah, it was mostly pretty easy. The hardest part was cloning the goddamn TRUCKS!"
IllegalityGirl:
The Milk Brigade is called out on active duty following Sunday's strike on Afghanistan.
Laurie2K:
In the wake of the former Soviet Union's demise, the patrol boy brigade of White Oaks Public School stands ready to serve its country after *LEASING* light production tanks and a few nukes (to save themselves the headache of having to develop a nuclear technology program of their own on such short notice.)
Geier:
Proudly they stood, silently proclaiming their readiness to serve in these trying times: America's last defense against the forces of worldwide terror and aggression, should the military, intelligence agencies, and police forces fail. They were pledged to serve with honor, strength, fairness, and (of course) good humor.
Mr_Grant:
The Carabinieri? I found the ones in Florence to be highly professional helpful. I don't see what anyone finds so funny about that...
abracadaver:
The White Panthers - aka Milkman's Union, local 587
malaclypse:
"Soldier, your uniform is a disgrace! And your ice cream truck has a paint fleck on the fender!" Sir, yes sir!" "Soldier, you are on pralines detail for a week!!"
starkbalmy:
"Give me two good men and a fleet of trucks, and I shall rule the WORLD!!! Or, at the very least, sell a hell of a lot of Push-ups and 50-50 Bars."
joe678:
*triumphant music in background* "Yes, dear friends, America's milk marshals stand bravely in the face of terrorism, prepared to fend off those godless A-rabs who would stop at nothing for the chance to contaminate our cows' precious bodily fluids!"
Daleman:
I scream, you scream, we all scream "I'll kill the next f*cking kid that asks me what flavor a fudgesicle is!"