Agent_Moldy:
"How's this?" *SNAP*
"Ow!"
"Relax, I'm a licensed masseuse, I know what I'm doing. How 'bout this, *CRACK* is that any better?"
"AAAAAAAAHHH!!!"
"Well, okay, let's try this. *CRUNCH* I bet you like that, eh?"
"Oh, sweet Lord! I think I'm paralyzed!!!"
"Oh, come on, don't be such a baby."
DiscoBoy:
"Ha! Once I destroy you, I will only be *five* degrees away from Kevin Bacon! Watch your back, pig-boy! I'm coming for you!"
KINGDINOSAUR:
Tura's a practicing literal extremist. When she says "Hands Off!" she usually takes the forearm, too, for good measure. Pray you never hear her say "You haven't got the balls!"
144b:
It's Tura Satana. The Chiropractor that goes that extra mile for you.
Ash_Skywalker:
Ash Skywalker, fed up with the nuisance customers at the movie theater, decides to finally act out her fantasies of being Lara Croft on the unsuspecting poopies.
rickubis:
To be sure the campfire is out, stir the ashes with a poker, a branch, or a middle-aged guy.
Generik:
Fig. 704-A from the updated Kama Sutra: The Dust Devil.
nastinkers:
You WILL touch my breasts if I have to break your arm to do it!!!
amycamus:
"Screw up your lines again, Zokar, and you'll be working the buffet at Palace Station - got it, buster??"
HoneyT:
"You want the titties? YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TITTIES!!!"
ArtMystery:
"Next time I tell you to stand on 17, you better by God STAND ON SEVENTEEN!!"
JediClone:
Suzanne Somers IS Lorenzo Lamas IN "She's The Renegade!"
teambanzai:
You were right about what you said about electing a Democrat for President. AND HERE'S WHAT HAPPENS WHEN THEY ELECT A REPUBLICAN!!!*SNAP!!!!*
starkbalmy:
Here's a big hand for the little lady...
BlakHat1:
"Say! Nice watch!"
joe678:
"He's trying to apply the Claw, but Tura's got him in an armbar.....Wait! What's she pulling out of her tights? It's a rear axle and differential assembly from a 1953 Henry J! And the referee doesn't see it!"
Beedo:
Beedo was amazingly persistent, and STILL asked if he could buy her a drink.
WEIRD_1:
The Ump Said You Are Out, Damn It
Annakie7:
"Relax, it's a natural exfoliant!"
LuvBJones:
THAT LIBRARY BOOK IS **OVERDUE**!!!!
Steve_Reeves:
"OK, OK, I promise! I'll never sing It's A Small Small World while we're having sex ever again!"
Lanzman:
The fateful day finally arrives: YingYang and Chyna, alone in the desert, and nature takes its inevitable course.
Buffoon:
"Dammit Ying! No means NO!!!"
MrBungle:
"Please! For God's sake!! I've been stranded in the desert for 14 days! I'm so thirsty! All I want is something to drink!!!"
Shandi:
I said I wanted DESSERT, not DESERT!
IllegalityGirl:
"My breasts are encased, so my hands will have to do the dirty work *this* time."
abracadaver:
How many times do I have to say it, only GABRIELLE is allowed to cop a feel! Damn men!
malaclypse:
Men are always harder to fold back up after you're done with them.
UnReality:
"Make a wish!" "Believe me, honey, it's already coming true!"
Mr_Grant:
From TV Guide, 6/24/78--
(4) Little Ninja On The Prairie (Rerun). Mary (Melissa Sue Anderson) returns from a visit to the Far East with strange new skills, as Isaiah Edwards (Victor French) discovers when his hands get a little too frisky.
Cast-- Pa: Alf Landon. Ma: Michael Lerner. Laura: Melissa Manchester. Nellie Oleson: Allison Anders.