Agent_Moldy:
"Can we play Beethoven's Fifth?" "No." "Aw, c'mon, pleeeeease?" "NO! You kids play what WE told you to play, and that's final!" "But we don't WANNA listen to Megadeth again!"
bugwber:
Realizing he'd just tried to play a handful of hardened duke on the family's new record player, Lance resigned himself to the fact that he was no longer the technological whiz-kid of the family. That mantle would descend to his younger sister Stacey, who thought the gas pedal in the car was sharp on the other end, so as to poke the little elves in the ass who carried their Edsel about town.
Lanzman:
The world shudders as Hip-Hop culture takes a disturbing new twist...
Steve_Reeves:
Mom and Dad thought they were helping their children hear some wholesome, good music when they bought an album by that Kid Rock boy from Detroit.
DiscoBoy:
America would never truly be "fly" and "where it's at" until the development of an additional turntable and a microphone.
Buffoon:
"..and I bought this one because the name of the artist is the same as Mom's!" "Well put it on son! Wow, Marilyn! Who ever thought you'd have a famous namesake! Grandma Manson would be so proud!"
144b:
"Say, are you hep cats into Race recordings? I've have a few of them I wish to play for you. The negro persons call this form of rambunctious music, Ja-azz. Funny name, huh?" "But, Harry. I heard that this music is of the devil." "Oh, c'mon. Eunice. That's what they say about wearing two tone shoes on Sunday."
Gowest:
Now let me demonstrate how this handy gadget works. [Throws dirt on floor]
GersonK:
"Golly gee gosh! Somebody's been using my Caruso albums to do lines again!"
teambanzai:
As Billy puts side one of Dark Side of the Moon on, Debbie dumps the dime bag into the middle of album jacket and proceeds to start taking the seeds out. Mom and Dad watch with pride.
HoneyT:
Hokey-dokey, folks, here's my 76-hour, uncut, uncensored version of "Tree-Frogs Concerto in A-flat minor." Hope ya like the sound of frog legs scraping tree bark.
BlakHat1:
"You see Mom, Dad... cutting and scratching are aspects of my game!" "Oh that's nice, Son! Ethel, what the HELL is he talking about?" "I think he's talking about woodworking, James!"
[apologies to E_B_A!]
Generik:
"Mom, Dad, tonight we have a special treat for you. Susan and I are going to present the musical 'Hair' and act out all the parts ourselves! Okay, Susan, start getting undressed while I put the music on..."
TeekieT:
o/^...WEED
That's what we smokin up
HOES
That's what we pokin up
DOUGH
That's what we foldin up
That's all we know about... o/^
...The Franklin family enjoys a little DMX before retiring for the night...
CaveDweller:
"Mom, dad... how many times have I told you to stop stealing my Marvin Gaye records?" "We know, son, but we just like to pop on 'Sexual Healing' whenever we feel like... well, you know what the kids call it these days... 'bumpin' uglies'..." "Tee-hee... Oh Steve, you say the sweetest things."
Annakie7:
"But Edna, I really want to show you how much I love you!" -- I'm sorry Tom, but I want to wait until we're married. -- "Okay, I love you and I respect your decision." *That's great kids. Now do you know what to do when you're confronted with sins of the flesh?* "This is really weird, dad....can me and sis leave now?"
Shandi:
"If you play Ozzy's 'Houses of the Holy' backwards, it says "Goooo to Chuuurch, Saaay your prayers -- TITHE!"... Weird, yes?"
abracadaver:
You folks are never gonna' believe this! If you play Glenn Miller's Moonlight Serenade backwards, you'll hear a recipe for peanut-butter fudge! Oh, and something about how we should drop out of school and become Satan's minions.
malaclypse:
Joey bursts in upon the family sing-along with a startling discovery: ants in the backyard have built their very own flying saucer! Phase 5 has begun!
Nyssa23:
"We've switched Jimmy's Perry Como record with Marilyn Manson's 'Antichrist Superstar.' Let's watch the fun."
MrBungle:
"Sure, It will be really keen to choose the after dinner music, Mr. & Mrs. Livingston. How about Count Basie's rendition of... Me So Horny?!?" .oO~I wonder what's on the B side? Baby Got Back (in B-minor)?!?!? Golly Gee.~Oo.
Mr_Grant:
1958: Industrialist Armand Hammer and family prepare to listen to their weekly instructions from the Kremlin, backward-masked onto that week's #6 single on the Billboard Top 50.
robofreak:
"Mom, Dad.. i think my recent career decision would best be descibed in this song i'm about to play. Now, i want you to really listen to it...i want you to know what i'm feeling. The song is called 'Smackin' the Ho's to be the Bigga Pimp' by The Thug Killaz."
Scypha:
Wow! A rare copy of 2 Live Crew's "Me So Horny... the reggae remix!" Put it on!