Agent_Moldy:
"I'll take two pounds of tongue, three pounds of snout, and five pounds of testicles."
"Into exotic meats?"
"Fear Factor producer."
"Ah."
Buffoon:
"What is 'Beef Penis,' Alex?"
<DING!> "Correct!"
"Great! I'll take 'Things Only Fren… um… Chinese are Drunk Enough to Eat' for $600 please."
144b:
Atkins? Smatkins! As long as it's meat, right?
questor:
In a related story on CNN it is reported that Charlotte, Porky, and Miss Piggy have all been reported missing by their respective agents.
DiscoBoy:
Is that you, Porky? NOOOOOOO!!!!!!
Reynard_T_Fox:
Gen managed to keep his lunch down until he got to the marketplace's sex toy vendor.
Lanzman:
Things Disney Never Tells You, Part 28 - What Really Happened to the Three Little Pigs.
Daleman:
For almost 3,000 years the number one joke in Chinese pork stores has been "Rectum? Dam near killed him!" Since most patrons give the butchers a scornful look they usually follow up with "Aisle two, just behind the intestines."
Generik:
"Welcome to Big Bad Wolf's Butcher Shop; please take a number. Now serving number 37... number 37..."
BlakHat1:
"I'll have the Cthulhu on rye with mustard, please!"
nashtbrutusandshort:
"Hello and welcome to *Gray's Anatomy: The Restaurant Experience*. Would you like pancreas with that?"
Shandi:
Wow, the color balance on that food is really OFF!
Batqueen:
"Welcome to the Heart Attack Buffet! Table for two?"
starkbalmy:
Kramer learns the hard way the awful truth of what became of the "Pigman."
keogh:
"Ummm... I think I'll have... that half-a-human there."
"Greta, that's not on the menu."
"Hey, everything's got a price."
Racerex:
Still, they say the Miskatonic University cafeteria has very good prices.
cambria36:
"You mean these are pigs?!? No wonder nobody showed up during Passover."
WEIRD_1:
Iron Chef Chen has made 4 dishes with the theme of "Dead Fish" including a steamed tray of week old shell fish. A sauce of Tums, Rolaids, and Prevacid is a nice topper to the dish. Steamed in squid ink, with whale tongue added for texture, this dish is a masterpiece.
Fishy flavor has been eliminated with the clever use of raw liver in an onion stuffing. The tasters will enjoy the heart and livers of the fish in a green sauce to be served as a dip. Rubber gloves, optional.
Japan's health officals are standing by with stomach pumps, if needed.
AAAron333:
"If you think that's bad, you should see our dessert cart!" (At which point our unseen chef breaks into a rousing rendition of 'Head Cheese')
Jacksinn:
Suddenly, a flash of inspiration hit, and Jason just knew that he was going to win first prize at the Costume Ball that Friday.
Beedo:
In England, we call this "a breakfast fry-up."
FryGirl:
Poetry, philosophy, art, edible sex toys... God, I love the Chinese!
nastinkers:
It's not every day that you can have an order of pig snout with a side of fried squid toes.
ArtMystery:
Years later, Carrie collaborated with a retired Clarice Starling to create the modestly successful Silence of the Swine Deli and Catering Service.
SilentFilmStar:
"Stella finally had to admit to herself that she was marrying into a redneck family when she discovered her future mother-in-law's ideas for the wedding menu."
lil_amish:
"Beef tongues... check! Pig snouts... check! Bladder of a donkey... check! Goat's eyeballs... check! Bat's upper intestines... check! Otter's noses and ocelot's spleens.... damn, no otter's noses? What kind of a deli counter is this anyway?"
Nyssa23:
"What really goes into those little 'meatballs' in canned spaghetti."
evetsggod:
EXTREEEEME Mr. Potato Head!
JurassicPork:
Alas, poor JurassicPork. I knew him...
TyranosaurisRex:
Thanks, I'll pass, but I hear Mickey Mantle is looking for another liver transplant.
chilwil:
"You want flies with that?"