Agent_Moldy:
Gen? GEN? I -- yes, I know how much you want it to happen, but Pink Lady just doesn't need any new members. Besides, they're Japanese, and I -- what? Well, maybe you can 'turn Japanese', but you remember what happened when you tried that at the Iron Chef auditions...
Buffoon:
.oO Damn, these people are accommodating. I’m sick as a dog, and I mention something to Sally about “draggin’ my ass to the throne,” and the next thing I know, I’m in a Dragon robe, and they’ve built a frickin’ throne for me! The only thing I’m not too clear about is why I have to wear a chamber pot on my head, but hey, what the Hell? I’ll go with it!
DiscoBoy:
"When I am king... every cap will contain a fart joke!"
144b:
Wait 'till the guys on Antiques Roadshow get a load of me?
Ash_Skywalker:
Emperor say "Huzzah!"
questor:
Welcome to the Happy King Imperial Buffet. Wednesdays are half off for kids under 6. Bring the family!!!
KINGDINOSAUR:
"Please to remove pants before entering the palace of Emperor Hoo-Che Fem."
BlueOnBlack:
In light of recent popularity of Asian cinema, Paramount proposes the sequel "Emperor Ralph" to John Goodman...
Lanzman:
Chinese Emperor restored to power, Communism Abandoned.
"Aah, screw it," said Deng Zhaopeng. "Nobody was buying this crackpot nonsense anymore, anyway."
Daleman:
That is the second most impressive toilet I’ve ever seen.
Phibes:
[Insert gratuitous "One from column A, one from column B" joke here]
Shandi:
"It was Confucius who first coined the phrase 'with 12 you get egg roll'!"
lil_amish_boy:
Wow! Carson from Queer Eye really outdid himself in making over THIS straight guy!
starkbalmy:
"What is the sound of one hand clapping? Allow me to demonstrate."
BlakHat1:
"There's that crackpot liberal Generik again! Wearin' a SILK DRESS fer cryin' out loud! I done TOLD you he was YELLER!"
FryGirl:
"I'm too sexy for this Empire!"
Neoknight:
Who's the man, NOW, dog?!
nastinkers:
Belly rubs 10 cents extra.
NameBrand:
"Talk to the hand, concubine, 'cause the Emperor ain't listening."
chilwil:
I can't believe it's not Buddha!
Racerex:
"It's a small kingdom. Well, actually, it's only my living room. But I rule it with an iron, yet benevolent, hand."
WEIRD_1:
Roseanne has really let herself go.
screaming_fist:
The Mall Mandarin says: "Many men smoke, but Fu Manchu."
Humoriste:
"Would it kill you to iron it?"
JoeCrow:
OHHHHHHHH..........
Mao's Dad is a big fat bitch
He's the biggest bitch in the whole wide world
He's the biggest bitch if there ever was a bitch
He's a bitch to all the boys & girls
Bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch,
Bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch...
gleeb:
"I... uh, hey... man, when *I* can't catch the waiter's eye, you know they're busy."
cambria36:
"Chinese hookers are ugly to the bone."
ArtMystery:
"Okay, first you go up the stairs in the Tower of Happiness, walk down the Hall of Mildness and look for the third door on your left, marked 'Mr. Milquetoast.' You can't miss it."
AAAron333:
Little known fact: Mr. and Mrs. Generik's trip to China was subsidized in part by the family of 12 Asian farmers living under Mr. G's fabulous robes.
JurassicPork:
"Bring me the head of Keanu Reeves!"
Jacksinn:
Translation of sign directly behind him: "Please deposit 100 yuan before high-fiving the Emperor."
flavio:
Welcome to House of Yummy. Our specials tonight are the Moo Goo Cheddar Fries $5.99, The Great Wall of Tater Skins $4.99 and the Peking Mozzarella Sticks $6.99. Can I get you guys started with some 3 Alarm Shaolin Nachos or some Confucius Wings?
Nyssa23:
"Screw the fiddlers three, just bring me my bowl and pipe! And maybe a few bags of Cheetos."
TyranosaurisRex:
If the silk worms didn't go on strike for an overtime clause after making this one, they should have.
Reynard_T_Fox:
"My loyal subjects, with your support, we can make this the best dynasty ever, and never mind that silly recount business, this is a time to be *united*. Now, on to the invasion list..."
JAUSTRALIS:
"Generik forgoes his usual Hawaiian print shirt for a more toned down, work casual outfit."
Generik:
"Off with his head!" The First Emperor of the Gen Dynasty shouted that all day long, but since no one in the court spoke English, not one head ever rolled. You just can't get good help these days.