Agent_Moldy:
"Well?" "I'm afraid it's hopeless. My crew has been down here for days, working tirelessly with all the king's men, but try as we might, we just can't put Mr. Dumpty together again. I'm sorry."
144b:
The idea of underground stables, for clydesdale horses wasn't winning too many fans from the fire station.
DiscoBoy:
"Um... Do you want to go two out of three?"
MilkboxLarry:
Try as they might, the local fire department just couldn't tell the ass from the hole in the ground...
Steve_Reeves:
"Chief, is it wise to let our mascot be the first one into the mine?"
questor:
Horse farming is easy, but the fall harvest is a bitch.
cambria36:
"Jackson Hole, Wyoming, was orginally called Jackass Hole, Wyoming."
Buffoon:
As casting continues for the remake of "The Great Escape"....
'NEXT!'
'No, really. I can do this. I was born to play this part!'
'Look, I'm really sorry. We're going to have an opening for the new "Mr. Ed" movie....'
'DAMMIT! I'm TIRED of being typecast!'
animebabe:
Mr Ed is Baby Jessica in "It's Mr. Gluestick To You, Officer!" tonight only on YSMT.
Reynard_T_Fox:
The Committee for Telling One's Ass From a Hole in the Ground faces their toughest challenge yet.
Generik:
"...and the horse you rode in on, John Agar! You too, Hugh Beaumont!" The Mole People bid a final farewell to their celebrity guests as they make their way back to the surface of the Earth.
BlakHat1:
"Do I have INSURANCE? I'm a HORSE for cryin' out loud! Hey! Where are you going? Come BAAAAACK!"
ArtMystery:
In a gesture of thanks and goodwill to the brave firefighters in southern California, a local theater troupe came out to their base camp and put on an impromptu performance of the well-known play "Equus."
Shandi:
Alright, none of that horsing around - get Horse out of the hole and let's go home!
lil_amish_boy:
The Day Mister Ed decided to go to Rehab.
Nyssa23:
"Birth of a centaur."
JurassicPork:
Grown-up Jessica McClure, an equestrian hopeful for the 2004 Athens Olympics, suffered a setback yesterday in the US steeplechase finals.
gleeb:
The only survivor of the terra-cotta army of Xi'an finally makes it to North America.
Ash_Skywalker:
When horsing around goes too far...
Cyberbeast:
"I don't know Chief, what do you get when you cross Mr. Ed with Norton from the Honeymooners?"
"Never mind."
AAAron333:
The local fire department's plan of pulling Rosie O'Donnell out of the well with a Clydesdale backfires in the worst way.
Motis:
Meanwhile, in our nation's capitol, the other end of the horse held a press conference.
Matteus:
Yet again, Mr. Ed. Even by tunneling, there is no escaping us.
Jacksinn:
It was only after Seabiscuit failed miserably at his training to become a firefighter that he decided to pursue a career in racing.
starkbalmy:
Rescue personnel couldn't figure out how to get Baby Jessica out of the well, so they did the next best thing -- they gave her a pony.
Daleman:
"With another six weeks of training I think we can get him to flush too."
Lanzman:
Tho it kept the racetracks clean, the "horse latrine" had some serious drawbacks.
Geier:
The constant string of cursing and epithets - all in ancient Greek - wending their way past the half-buried equine made two things abundantly clear: (1) The god Hades had packed on a few extra pounds over the last few millenia. And (2) A modern-day Rape Of Persephone would not be in the offing any time soon.
Racerex:
"Okay guy, I've scoped it out and I think we can save those miners. I'll need an acetylene torch, a box of flares, and -- oh, yeah, get me some oats while you're at it."
nastinkers:
Ironically, the horse's name was Baby Jessica.
cisco3600:
O, for a horse with wings.
Amon:
After yet another loss, the Denver Broncos find themselves in yet a bigger hole in the AFC West.