Agent_Moldy:
o/Ohhhh, you better watch out,
you better not cry,
you better not pout,
I'm tellin' you why,
Santa Claus is passed out, again.
He's drunk off his ass,
he's only half dressed,
he's stoned on some grass,
he's really a mess,
Santa Claus is passed out, again.
He's seeing flying donkeys,
he knows that can't be right,
he can't remember where he lives,
or where the hell he was last night.
Soooo, forget about gifts,
forget it this year,
forget about what you're seeing right here,
Santa Claus is passed out, againnnnn...o/
Buffoon:
Oh, sure... It happens to me ONE time, and can I ever live it down? No. You guys are relentless.
suggs:
Father Christmas finally goes through with his threat to 'Get some Nawlin's love for once!', and the results are what all the elves expected.
DiscoBoy:
Christmas comes to the Hanoi Hilton.
144b:
Hey! eeEnnbody 'round here seen mah hat? Whut 'bout a shled with some flyin' reindeers? HIC!
Steve_Reeves:
Carries a sign during the day, "Will Chuckle Jovially For Food"...
Lanzman:
"Hey kidsh . . . >hic< . . . lift Shanta's hat to shee the elves . . .>burp< . . .
questor:
I think this is ample illustration of how men are portrayed on the Lifetime Channel.
Ash_Skywalker:
Obviously, Santa was VERY good this year to have his stocking stuffed so well.
Generik:
"Excuse me, Santa! Cardinal Law says there are still nearly a dozen children who want to sit on your lap and tell you what they want for Christmas, and he says that if you want to get paid, you'll get back in here and finish them up right away. Okay? Okay...? Santa...?"
HoneyT:
*song* "I saw Mommy done nailed Santa Claus... underneath the mistletoe last night..."
Chebby:
The Brooklyn Crips didn't care if he was the man in the moon. It was their turf.
NightTrain:
The inspiration for Sonny Boy Williamson's "Down and Out Blues."
nastinkers:
Some of the elves decided to play a little trick on Santa after a prolonged labor dispute.
ArtMystery:
o/` "You can leave your hat on..." o/`
WEIRD_1:
What do you mean you posted the photos at dirty_santa_does_the_elves.com?
AAAron333:
Once again, on December 26th, Mrs. Claus finds Santa passed out in the back alley of some seedy strip club in Thailand. And hers is the thankless job of sobering him up and trying to explain to the elves why the "Boss" has these dark episodes.
flavio:
Santa makes the mistake of lingering a bit too long at the Kennedy Compound.
Nyssa23:
"From the people who brought you 'Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer,' comes another song destined to be a holiday classic: 'Santa Got Mugged By a Crackhead.'"
Shandi:
Santa hits the skids in "When Elves Attack" on "Sick Sad World!" Next!
chilwil:
o/` Santa got waylaid by my brownies/ cooked up along with thc/ some pretend that Santa's just a drunkard/ but as for me and my dealer, we disagree... o/`
starkbalmy:
"Hey Santa! Is that a candy cane in your hat, or are you just happy to see me?"
Janx:
Some hundred million parents have banded together in filing a class action lawsuit against Santa Claus today, claiming he unwittingly caused untold mental anguish to their children when he neglected to fulfil his annual Christmas obligations. Mr. Claus was unavailable for comment.
Daleman:
"... and a Merry Christmas to (hic) all and to all a great f*cking night. Now give me my five bucks and get the f*ck out of here!"