Laserblast:
One 12-minutes-of-dead-air sketch with Tom Poston that won't be appearing on the "Late Show With David Letterman Anniversary Special."
MirandaRamsey:
I hate to admit it, but $19.95 is indeed red hot.
TravisBickle:
Next on Frasier... Niles and the Embarassing Open Sores. Must NOT See that.
Hippie:
You were a Thriller. You were Bad. You were Dangerous. It's been a while now--you're History.
Hippie:
Tonight when the master's asleep we go for it. I know a poodle in the Underground Railroad.
TravisBickle:
Oooh, does it have the episode where Data tried to learn about sex by plugging his manhood into an electrical outlet? I love the surprised look on Spiner's face.
Hippie:
Sci-Fi Prime from 7 to 11 p.m.? Must be mistaken. I'm watching and all I see is Sliders and Farscape and First Wave. Is it between those perhaps?
MirandaRamsey:
Steven Tyler in the early 80s. Oh, the humanity.
E_B_A:
"And the doctor installed the drainage bag here." "Ma! We go through this EVERY Thanksgiving!" "I wet 'em again!" "Ack!"
KINGDINOSAUR:
"Maybe I can do something you'd really like." How Liberace survived the Holocaust on the next A&E Biography.
Artanas:
"Living la vida Dracul. Have you heard? Maestro, hit it one time por favor!"
TravisBickle:
You know, when I get to the Gates of Heaven, if I see Conrad Bain in drag, I'm gonna demand I be sent to Hell immediately.
Artanas:
"Hello, I'm Rod Serling and this is what I can do with my leftover urethra tissue. Tonight's story, a wonderful voyage through my inner most private areas."
GersonK:
Sassy!
Artanas:
"I have a complaint to file, officer Elongated-Man." "You'll have to sign these, Scat-Faced-Matriarch."
Laserblast:
F. Murray Abraham is in desperate need of a skin-tightening. Oh, and it looks like the Son'a makeup can use a touchup as well.
Hippie:
Hello! Officer Ninkotomen, popping up through the dark hyperspace portals imbedded in the captain's chair! Can I help you, ma'am?
E_B_A:
"Hello? Casting? I wanna know why you couldn't spring for more money to get Mrs. Reagan on the show? Well it's embaressing! It doesn't even say its lines!"
GersonK:
"Hello, this is KV92Y5 - with an important message: I have a ham radio. Over."
Hippie:
Early tabloids just wouldn't leave this Paula Martin alone. "Paula Martin to have mattress surgically implanted in back to save time!"
Artanas:
"Caller number 3, what have I eaten today?" *Huh?* "Tell me, and you win a prize" *Ummm... Kuwait?* "Sorry, the answer was the legendary city of Pompei."