MrTim:  
We now return to _The   
Adventures of Max Mercury_.  

Matteus:  
"I'm so Gay!" (really)  

Xylorjax:  
We now return you to "Pleasantville  
II: The Running of the Carriages".  

LuvBJones:  
"**Gotta dance**!!"  

Beedo:  
Dublin's annual Running of the  
Wimpy Little Jerks.  

Artanas:  
o/'...I ...want....to ...be free!  
I ...want to...be meeeee'  

Agent Moldy:  
*pant, pant* "Must...run...faster...  
must...catch...career... *pant, pant*  
before it... sails...away..."  
  
 

    
Reynard_T_Fox:
"No, I don't have a ticket, but I do
have an autographed 8X10 glossy 
for ya! Love, Leo, whaddya say?"
"Captain, we have another oarsman."

HanoverF:  
"Golden Ticket? Yeah right,  
who're you trying to fool?!" 

Kel's Winter: 
Young Indiana Jones shows us were  
he got the old 'Passport Schtick' from 

MrTim:  
"Let's see . . . Mister Dicaprio, is it?  
Occupation: Teen Sex Symbol?" "Yes."  
"Reason for your trip on the _Titanic_?" 
"Um, dying horribly in an accident."  
"Oh! Well, right this way Mister Dicaprio!  
Hope you enjoy your trip!" 

Neoknight:  
"What do you mean I need ID!? I'm 
Leonardo DiCaprio, dammit!" 

LuvBJones:  
Leo at Social Services - "Mr.  
DiCaprio,have you acted this week? 
Have you tried to act this week? Do  
you intend to act soon?" 

JediClone:  
Of course he's safe to bring on board.  
See, I've got his pedegree and   
he's had his shots.

   
MrTim:   
These urinals are crowded!  

Artanas:  
"Merry Christmas mister Albert!  
 Merry Christmas mister....Oswald?  
 *BLAM*"  

Angel_Noir:  
In frame #1089 of the Zapruder film, we  
can see the bullet barely missing keogh.  

Matteus:  
like lemmings they run to the  
edge and fall off  
  
LuvBJones:  
"*GOTTA DANCE!!!*"  

Beedo:  
I can see my house from here!  
 
   
 MrTim:  
And the ship pulls away from the harbor,  
carrying its load of cigarettes for Atlas.  

Angel_Noir:  
"Number One, set a course for Deneb  
4. Maxiumum warp!" "Sir?" "Engage!"  
"What are you talking about?"  
"Captain's Log, Stardate 1245: I  
fear mutiny from the crew..."  
  
Beedo:  
Matte painting!  

JediClone:  
MATTE PAINTING? Get with the  
times! It's a "digital backdrop"!  

Matteus:  
*cough* is the engine running right?  
  
Xylorjax:  
Ya' know, anyone who knowingly  
gets on something HEAVIER than  
water and sails off into the ocean  
deserves what they get. 

    
MrTim:  
After staring for five minutes, she finally   
realizes she's not looking at a mirror.  

Artanas:  
"Cthulhu playing poker.  How droll..."  

Angel_Noir:  
The painting to be lost forever,  
the world would be denied the  
splendor of dogs playing poker  
until several decades later.  

Matteus:  
it's ugly, burn it  

Neoknight:  
"You know, they'd look a lot  
better nude..."  

Beedo:  
Yes, it's horribly obscene, but is it ART?  

JediClone:  
"Aw thank you! An original Keogh!  
This is going to be worth *so much*  
when he finally kills himself!"  

LuvBJones:  
"Nice portrait, but it could use  
some thigh-high ermine boots."

    
Artanas:  
"Watch me pop a wheely  
with this sumnabitch..."  

Angel_Noir:  
"I'm the king of the-Ahhhhh!"  
*Splash!* "Man overboard, Captain."  
"I didn't see anything."  
  
Matteus:  
should we let them know it's  
a huge cheese wedge?  

Neoknight:  
"What're you looking at, sir?"  
"Whatever you're looking at" "But I'm  
looking at whatever you're looking at!" 
"This could take a while...." 

LuvBJones: 
"We're out of Taster's Choice." 

JediClone: 
The Captain gets an early start 
ignoring his First Officer's advice. 

Beedo: 
.oO{I'm gonna SINK this bitch!} 

Agent Moldy: 
"What is it, Captain?" "Oh, just some 
bloody, stupid American dolt going on 
about being a king or something." 

Xylorjax: 
"Dolphins, dead ahead. 
Ramming speed, Mr. Sulu.