Bigstupid:
I wore this shirt to work every day, man. And now they're closing it down. And they're like "Give us our shirt back." "And I'm like...DUDE!"
JediClone:
o/'Beacuse they're assholes! Identical assholes naturally! They sigh alike, they lie alike, sometimes they even cry alike! WHAT A SCUMMY PAIR!
Meldrick:
"My wife says she doesn't regret trading in her voice to you at all, Mr Sheets."
E_B_A:
which is kind of like choosing whether to be disemboweled with a sharp fork or a staple remover.
Meldrick:
"I just bought some real estate on the net. From now on, it's 'Carlton This', and any blurry screengrab will be a 'Sheogh.'
E_B_A:
"Hi! I'm Carol Smith! You may remember me as that lady who exercises nude in her living room with a picture window that faces a school bus stop!"
Reynard_T_Fox:
Crap! My cake!
E_B_A:
She married a Teletubby?
JediClone:
In a blind taste test, people prefered the coma they got from inhaling Orange Glo over the one they got from BrandX!
E_B_A:
"Soup... it's good fumes..." "NEXT!"
Buffoon:
...and the fact that this is Al Gore's motorcade makes it even less interesting.
JoeAverage:
"Whiskey and soda." "Umm, sir, this is the city commmissioner's office." "Then make it a double."
nashtbrutusandshort:
Just a sec. (checks pulse) Yep, I'm still alive. I was worried there for a moment.
Reynard_T_Fox:
"What? Hamburger and a *large* fry? Okay, never fear, your order will be out in just a second!" *kapwing*
ViX44:
If you eat enough, record your farts, and play the tape backwards you can hear the whole recipe.
GersonK:
And even if it was cocaine, we refuse to get drawn into the politics of bean destruction.
nashtbrutusandshort:
In 1985, I said that Journey SHOULD be sent to the center of the Earth--and left there. Along with Styx and Mr. Mister. Make it so.
Reynard_T_Fox:
"Damn, all I can hear is this buzzing sound! These Norelco cell phones suck!"