wd40:
A determined capper strains his brain in an attempt not to cap, "$20, same as in town!"
da_upstart:
Dolph Lundgren rates the boys' performance in a typical bar room brawl.
Datazoid1701:
I warned the sofa that if it didn't give me back the remote I would kick the stuffing out of it.
Hinermad:
Ever since the accident, I can stick my finger in my kneecap like this.
144b:
Pull De String! CUT! Not yet, Bella? Okay, Eddie.
beckett:
"It a Popup book of the Dead."
beckett:
"And Kam Fong as the Beaver"
Kota:
.... and so, after my wife threw away all of my colorful ties, I got these curtains for my office. I'm a REBEL, you know!!!
Kota:
Once again, NONE of the girls that they invited bothered to show up for their party. What WOULD they do with all of that lemonade???
Dante83:
"No, I CAN'T dig it." ""Man, you are four by four, strictly square."
gleeb:
"Honey, call the doctor. My temperature is only 37." "You've got the Canadian thermometer again, haven't you?"
Dante83:
It's a music montage of the wonders of boric acid. And long overdue, if you ask me.
Datazoid1701:
In every society, there's some wacky "cure" for a hangover.
JackOfAllArts:
"Back in my day day, we were ALL nerds! And by golly, we LIKED it that way!"
gleeb:
Look, if that Maxwell House bitch gets out of line, drop a house on her!
144b:
Here's where I keep the ashes of my third husband. He was a cheap bastard.
wd40:
One day, I will be a pricipal, and I will rule he hallways with an iron hand, and no man jack better call me Missy again!
GersonK:
Lorne Greene expression #456 (#352 American): Not upset, just disappointed
UnReality:
"What's the capital of Zimbabwe? Where was Marco Polo born? If a tree falls in the woods and --" "Shoot first, you idiot!"
gleeb:
Yep, when the wife sees this necklace, I'm gonna be back in the catbird seat.
Hinermad:
The powerful motor can overcome the most reluctant pets and the extra-large bag can hold over 3 cats!
beckett:
"...and, it's so powerful you can suck up the cat!"
rickubis:
Get outta my shade.
GersonK:
"Hi. I'm Ed, I'll be your waiter today." "Waiter? This is a restaurant? Thought this was an abandonded field." "I'm freelance."
GersonK:
He say wuuuun and wuuuuun and wuuuun and wuuuuun are four. Has to be a chicken cuz he's so good to eat.
Datazoid1701:
Suddenly, Patty Andrews forgets what instrument that boy in company B plays.