Amon:
Hey, Kramer was right! There *ARE* pigmen in that hospital!
AlsWaiter:
Who is this guy? Get him away from me!
Amon:
Callista Flockhart before she started to get thin... ner...
Archris:
"...fat and cholesterol free. No one can get enough of my Schwetty Balls..."
Amon:
What do you see? Two dice on the number 5? Or eight small holes?
Generik:
"Jheri Curl? Yeah, man, I got the real stuff in here. The first one's free, but after that, it's gonna cost ya."
Archris:
"Excuse me, kind sir, could you carry this on the plane with you for me, I just need to get my... ur... uh... kid."
Amon:
"Now, everyone's talkin' about those there Krispy Kreme donuts. But I tell ya, for my money, nothin'll ever top a double-chocolate cake donut from Bakery Buddy."
Archris:
"Come on! You can do it, buddy! Noone's ever been hurt by an elevator button... this is so NUTS... buttons cant' hurt me, elevator buttons CAN'T hurt me..."
Amon:
*thinking to self* "I always thought it was a joke that this is how the elevators in the St. Louis Arch work."
Amon:
Wow! Bitchin' shadow puppet of a mountain gorilla!
Archris:
So what do you ladies think of these pictures? "DAMMIT Joe! Don't flash those pictures on us now! Were eating for God sakes."
Amon:
"Are you *SURE* there's no spinach there? Could you look again, please?"
Archris:
"Yup, we spent our vacation in Holland, because it's one of the only countries that allows same sex marriages."
soultaker:
"Security, can you stop this guy from playing with his rod during my speech?"
Ramon3k:
Caught on Tape: The jacuzzi bandit.
splickery:
Help! My wife Saran-Wrapped me to the sofa!
GKW44:
Sadly, little Annie's toy 'robot puppy' went balistic after seeing the family PC. Thus are the risks of not spaying your pets.