Lanzman:
Harriette was overjoyed when she made first contact with the space people. Sadly, her happiness was short-lived when it turned out to be just another Ovaltine commercial. Rich, chocolaty Ovaltine.
Daleman:
I just *have* to hear the latest news from Lake Wobegon.
Generik:
In her later years, Rose Mary Wood enertained herself by putting on an old Beatle wig and listening over and over to that missing 18 minutes of presidential tape... "Oh, Mr. Nixon! Oh, yes, Mr. Nixon, YES!!" etc. etc.
cambria36:
Eddie, who's looked uncomfortably like a girl for far too many years, thinks he has finally sent in enough baking soda box-tops to qualify him for a Captain Marvel masculinity make-over. Shazam!!!
lil_amish:
Granny voice: "You kids, with your internets and your hula hoops and your crystal meth! This is what we used to do in my day!"
Racerex:
"Ming? Is that you, Ming? It's Edna from Bakersfield. Yes, THAT Edna! You're coming in so clear, you'd think Mongo was just across the street! Of course I'm free this Saturday night...."
KIPPAGE:
Madge accidently discovers an adult toy...
DancingQueen:
"Aww yeah... the neighbors are screwing again! I hope Henry can get it up this time... oh... oh well, there's always next time..."
UnReality:
"Good old FDR, rockin' the mike like a vandal..."
flavio:
We now return to The Fresh Prince of Menlo Park starring Emo Phillips as DJ Jazzy Emily Dickenson.
nashtbrutusandshort:
Mama Sorvino's days as a shortwave operator in the Resistance later came in handy when the family's first VCR got jammed.
tinaw:
"Whoa! I think I hear the Bronx burning!"
da_upstart:
We now return you to GO GO MECHA JAPANESE SUPERHERO MOM starring Jack Black already in progress...
Amon:
Trying desperately to tune in the Dodgers game for her son, Mrs. Ellison remarks "Trying to get this thing to work is like working with stone knives and... stone knives and bear skins! Harlan, come here! I've got the Spock line you've been looking for!"
scypha:
The sister to Xigeous (from "My Favorite Martian" and NOT our fellow capper) had just figured out about the Bush Administration's wiretapping scandal. And how did she find out? Simple. Wiretapping by using a couple cartons of milk and a reel to reel tape deck!
Katze:
Technology brings pornography to a new level.
carbonbased:
Abigail smiled quietly as she heard the news -- RMS Titanic, which refused to hire transexual officers, was no more.
Wookie96:
Betty, the Jetson's maid, finally figures out how to 'take control' of her life.
Kahn:
I hear dead people!
IMissMST3k:
"Mars to Mr. Bean... Mars to Mr. Bean!"
Agent_Moldy:
o/All we see is *clap-clap*
Radio nutjob *clap-clap*
Radio koo-koo *clap-clap*
Radio nutjob...o/
Kota:
Hey, I can hear a cave! Or is it an echo chamber? Of course you can, George Bush, now turn in ON!
wd40:
{in Morse code} Why yes, Delano, I did get your lo-fat milk... shall I have the Secretary of State bring it to you?
"Did you get that one Franklin, dear?"
WEIRD_1:
Hey, that aluminum hat Larry wears really works. I can hear his every thought.