Widget:  
"Next on the SciFi Channel--Joel  
Schumacher's 'Swamp Thing'!" 

Matteus:  
Deep in the heart of the  
100 acre wood... 

Jorie:  
Discouraged, Luke left Yoda's 
hut never to be seen again. 

LuvBJones:  
Meanwhile, in a septic tank  
not far from town... 

Angel_Noir: 
Meanwhile on "Creepshow"... 

Dibbley: 
Though they were stuck in the swamp, 
the Legion of Doom's parties rivaled 
those of nearby Porky's. 

JediClone and Beedo: 
o/' I met him in a swamp down 
in Dag-o-bah, where it bubbles all 
the time like a giant carobonated 
soda! S-O-D-A soda! 
 

  

MrTim:  
MTV's Kennedy puffs on her pipe  
as she ponders who to call in next to,  
ah, "deal with" Joel Schumacher. 
 

Reynard T Fox:  
"I don't understand it.  Why won't  
Frohike and Byers return my calls?" 

LuvBJones:  
A little lipstick really *does* 
do wonders! 

Dibbley: 
"Sorry Mulder, the other guys 
are at a Trek convention." 

Beedo: 
Note to self: get out of this 
turkey as soon as possible. 
 
JediClone: 
Though few historians will admit it, 
Aunt Jamima was actually a pastey 
white Flower Child from New Jersey 

Angel_Noir: 
"Lets see...I know I put that sex 
apeal around here somewhere..." 
 

  

MrTim:  
So, my . . . unconventional  
conventioners! 

LuvBJones:  
Ahhh, 3.2 beer clubs... 

NightTrain: 
"Tonight, my unconventional 
conventionists..." 

MrTim:  
(Note to self: Look at gallery 
*before* capping old pics.) 
 
 

  

LuvBJones:  
Chili peppers burn his gut? 

JediClone: 
Hey you! How can I move while 
the Earth is turning? Huh! How 
can I sleep while this bed is 
burning? ANSWER ME! 

NightTrain: 
Please! No more Celine Dion! 
I'll talk, I'll talk. (Sob!) 

Dibbley: 
Finally, someone thought to make 
a knife out of kryptonite. 
 
 

  

LuvBJones: 
Insert '80s hair band *here*. 

Widget:   
The new scent from Calvin Klein! 

MrTim: 
Looks like Kennedy decided on  
Venom. Let the bloodbath begin! 

Angel_Noir: 
Failed Advertising Strategies 
#652: "Tang" 

HanoverF: 
Jan knew someday someone was 
likely to get horribly scarred, or worse, 
killed by the large flask of venom she 
kept on the coffee table, but 
it had such sentimental value... 

NightTrain: 
Hey! Why doesn't Sci-Fi show 
"Venom"? It's a really good film! 
Oh, that's why. 
 

  

LuvBJones: 
"But it's the pelvic thruuuuust/ That  
really drive's 'em insayayayayane!" 

Reynard T Fox:  
Filmed in Nausea-Vision. 

JediClone: 
At The Lovely Elizabeth's request,  
the WCW started selling "Inflatable 
NWO Sexmachines" 

Beedo: 
We take yo now to "Alien 3," 
already in progress 

NightTrain: 
Birth of a wrestler.