Angel_Noir:
Bob tried to hide his anger when someone else showed up at the office Christmas party dressed as a fat slob.
Angel_Noir:
"Is that what I think it is?" "Yeah, I did just what you told me to." "Son, when I said 'Take care of Grandma,' I didn't mean TAKE care of her!"
Angel_Noir:
"...So we figured 'What the hell, the 1,000,000 watt front porch lights are on sale'..."
Angel_Noir:
Billy's abillity to hide a coat in his stomach and then regurgitate it on command sure impressed the chicks.
Angel_Noir:
Home improvement tools that didn't work: The Fiber Optic Rake.
Angel_Noir:
When Balloon Animals Attack!
Angel_Noir:
Click on age to see hot photos...
Angel_Noir:
Taking a cue from his therapist, Bob decided to "lighten up" and whittled his "People to Kill" list until it fit on a Post-It.
Angel_Noir:
"Dad!" "Not now... Hey baby!" "Dad... the restraining order..."
Angel_Noir:
"You said there was smoke on it!" "Geez Bob, It's just a song! Literalist bastard!"
Angel_Noir:
"And he put his... 'thing' right here!" "And he was singing?" "Yeah, he was singing 'Hail to the Chief!'"
Angel_Noir:
The Unabomber's Web site